Wednesday, December 11, 2013

A Shift in Priority

Yesterday I was chatting (and by chatting, I mean emailing) with Karen. Since meeting her/getting pregnant 4 month or so later, she has kind of been my go-to for having it all. Balancing work and family obligations with your health and fitness loves and trying to make it all work. She has been invaluable to me as a resource for these things, and I am grateful for her insight, even when it makes me mad. And sometimes, it does.

I am slowly learning that right now, having it all is very different than what I used to think of having it all. Right now, I know that dedicating my life to my family, J and Addie, etc, needs to be my top priority. Having a kid is interesting and different with the relationship that I have with J. I know that is pretty much par for the course in the first year of having a baby, at least, that seems to be the general consensus. So I need to be able to dedicate some spare time to him (spare time? ha!) Addie is an all encompassing, needy, teeny little peanut of a human. So she absolutely takes up tons of time when I used to do other things.

Things that I used to like to do?
  1. Go shopping alone
  2. Run first thing in the morning
  3. Sleep
  4. Cook meals
Now, I am slowly slowly coming to terms with the fact that those 4 things are no longer the top of my list of most important fun things to do. The things that are suffering the most are running and sleeping. Because I am busy with work, I rarely have a chance to leave during lunch to squeeze in a run the way that I might like to do. And then when I get home from work, my day is full of the baby.

I need to come to terms with the fact that I could sneak in a run sometimes when I do not, but because that has fallen a little bit on my list of priorities, and I would rather spend the time with Addie and J. I know that I complain and feel guilty a lot (pretty much every single day) about not getting my workouts in, but I know that it is a choice that I make, regardless of the guilt and complaining. I choose to spend time with my family. I choose to focus on my job. I have made all of these choices for the betterment of the life of my family and they are the right choices for all of us right now.

Anyone else deal with this realization?

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